No matter how much love you may have had for your spouse when you were still married, it becomes extremely difficult to communicate in a healthy way after the divorce. For some couples, it even becomes impossible to be in the same room with each other. It is normal to develop dislike or even hatred towards your ex, but communication is still important.
Unhealthy communication, whether due to stress, anger, or guilt, can lead to unresolved conflicts. Learning to communicate properly with your ex-spouse becomes even more important when you have children. If you are unable to navigate through your divorce due to your emotional stress, a divorce attorney in Columbus, Ohio can lessen your burden.
Tips for communicating after divorce
- Write instead of talking.
Divorce can manifest hostile feelings and even create hatred for each other. You may feel like every time you talk to your ex-spouse, it becomes difficult to control your anger and be civil. It is easy to start arguing and even have a full-blown fight. One way to fix this is by communicating through writing instead of talking.
Technology has made conversation simpler. You may write text messages or emails to your ex-spouse rather than conversing with them face-to-face. Here, there are lesser chances of fighting since your ex will have the time to process the information and formulate a response.
- Stay civil at all times.
No matter what your ex might have done during the marriage, it is important to remain civil during your conversations. This is even more crucial when you have children together since you will need to communicate with your ex often. If you feel like your ex keeps pushing your buttons, take some time before responding to them. Stay silent when you are angry, or you may regret what you have said.
- Be a good listener.
The key to good communication is being a good listener. There is a time to speak and a time to listen during a conversation. Both parties must allow each other to speak and complete their sentences before speaking again. Listening carefully allows you to grasp what they are saying. After all, you cannot respond properly unless you know what the other party has said.
- Use mediation for difficult topics.
If a difficult conversation is pending, you may be nervous about initiating it since you know it may cause trouble. To avoid a full-blown, ugly fight, you may hire a mediator to offer practical solutions for various issues. Since a mediator is a neutral third party, you can rest assured that they will look out for your and your ex’s best interests.